Red Barton and The Sky Pirates

I want to root for the small, scrappy thing. That is basically my whole job. Red Barton and the Sky Pirates has a genuinely appealing premise: a cartoon steampunk world, hand-drawn illustration work stitched into cutscenes, a WWI-era fighter plane, sky pirates with names. There is the skeleton of something charming here, and I can see the team in Serbia believed in it. That makes what follows harder to write, not easier. The game is a third-person on-rails arcade flight shooter, the kind where the camera pushes forward automatically and your only job is to strafe left and right, shoot what appears ahead of you, and survive. Think of it as the genre Star Fox perfected. The problem is that every mechanical thing the genre requires, this game fumbles. Your plane moves with the responsiveness of a barge. The aiming sits slightly above where the iron sights suggest, a mismatch you adapt to in minutes but never fully forgive. The boost button, which should be your emergency tool for threading enemy patterns, barely changes your speed and reads more like an accidental field-of-view slider. There are only four levels, each short enough that a full run on Easy clocks in around 20 minutes. The hard mode, named "Good Luck," does not redesign enemy patterns or add new enemy types. It makes every enemy a one-hit kill. That is the entire design concession to difficulty. The story frames Red Barton as a heroic pilot fighting a power-mad king to rescue a childhood sweetheart and restore the kingdom of Diamondia. The comic-book cutscene style has honest visual personality, and the opening FMV is not embarrassing. The writing, however, barely rises above placeholder dialogue, cycling through the same short exchanges between Barton and the villain at each level break. After the final level, the ending pivots into what appears to be a DLC advertisement, which is a genuinely startling choice for a game this brief. A "Night Mode" exists to replay the campaign with different lighting, and the Steam page promises future world-building updates to what it calls the "Diamondtopia universe," but there has been no meaningful post-launch expansion since 2017. I try to find the thing worth protecting in every small release. Here it is: the art direction has a coherent identity. The steampunk cartoon aesthetic is cohesive, nothing looks borrowed or mismatched, and whoever did the illustration work clearly cared. That is real. It is just not enough to carry four undercooked levels and controls that fight you the whole way. Kai, Scout Team

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