Cat Lady - The Card Game

I cover shooters for a living, so when Cat Lady landed in my queue I gave it maybe two sessions before filing it away. That was three weeks ago. I've since played it during every queue pop, every loading screen, every moment I couldn't be bothered to boot something heavier. That should tell you most of what you need to know. The core loop is a 3x3 card grid from which you pull an entire row or column on your turn. Cats, food (tuna, chicken, milk), toys, costumes, catnip, and spray bottles all cycle through that grid, and the guard cat token blocks whichever row or column was just taken, so you can never just react to what the previous player grabbed without thinking one step ahead. That one rule creates a surprising amount of friction for a game that runs two to five minutes per session. Deny your opponent the column they need to feed their cats, over-draft on costumes to lock the six-point majority bonus, or go all-in on catnip and watch the VP math swing hard at end-game. The scoring has enough overlapping conditions that the "right" strategy shifts every single game, and that keeps the grid decisions from going stale. There are three AI difficulty levels if you're playing solo, and the AI on the top setting will absolutely deny you cards you need in a way that feels personal. The local multiplayer works cleanly because the open information format means nobody has a hidden hand to protect. You can genuinely crowd four people around a screen and the game is legible without any awkward pass-the-keyboard gymnastics. The global leaderboard adds a faint score-chase hook for solo players, though it won't satisfy anyone looking for async online play, which this version doesn't have. That's the real gap in the package: there's no online matchmaking, so PvP is strictly couch co-op territory. Nomad Games' port is tidy. The UI communicates the grid state clearly, animations don't drag, and the hand-drawn aesthetic holds up fine on any resolution you're likely to run. Early reports flagged some bugs at mobile launch, but the PC version at this price point sits in a bracket where the occasional minor hiccup won't sting. The AI's decision patterns are readable once you've played a handful of games, meaning veteran players will eventually outpace even the hardest difficulty with a bit of food-denial discipline, so long-term solo depth is modest. If you want a game with a deep ranked ladder or extensive metagame, look elsewhere. This is a palate cleanser, not a main course. For anyone who plays digital tabletop games, casual strategy fans who can appreciate tight design in a small box, or someone looking for a no-fuss local multiplayer title that non-gamers can actually pick up in under three minutes, this does exactly what it sets out to do. It's not built for the competitive crowd, and it knows it.

Fred · Scout Team

Shooters

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